genuine conversations

7 Tips to having more Genuine Conversations

I recently asked what people would like to learn more specifically for growing their business. One of the constant comments that arose was surrounding conversations. These included genuine conversations, transition to business from personal, closing, etc.

And, I get it. There’s nothing worse than having a great conversation with someone, and then they turn around and sell you, right?

But guess what? When these conversations are coming from the right place — we don’t feel sold.

Think about the last time you supported a friend (Facebook included) or family member in their small business. Chances are, you bought not because you felt pressured to but because you wanted to. Additionally, many people believe in the thought of supporting a small business but aren’t even sure where to start doing so other than the mom-and-pop shops.

This, of course, is from a customer angle.

People want to buy from you when you develop a real relationship through genuine conversations.

From a business standpoint, also referred to as recruiting, how can you possibly know what someone ‘needs’ or ‘wants’ without knowing anything about them? Too often, we try to jump the gun and recruit someone who isn’t there yet.

However, they may have gotten there if you had just focused on the relationship instead.

But now, you’ve lost them (potentially), right?

Everything that proceeds from being sold will feel less and less genuine and authentic. Here’s hoping today’s blog will help you if you’ve found yourself caught in that place. 

7 Tips to having more Genuine Conversations


Reach out in a Meaningful Way


Let’s talk Facebook for a moment; it reminds us of when our friends’ birthdays are, right? This is one of the best places to start when reaching out and meaningful about it. For example, sending a personalized message to their inbox either through text or voice notes is a great place to start.

Most people will respond with a thank you at the very least. Guess what? You have now opened a conversation without requiring any work or skill other than a birthday wish.

Alternatively, you may notice one of your Facebook friends had a baby. Again, reach out via messenger to congratulate them, throw in how cute the baby is, hope everyone is healthy and happy, etc. Chances are, they will respond.

Another example will be if you read that someone is having a bad day. Sometimes all people want is to know someone else is there and listening — it’s OK to be that person (as long as you mean it, of course).

We are in the people business — you know how to be a person! So using these situations is ideal for opening up genuine conversations without additional pressures or scripts.

Focus on being Relatable


As mentioned above, let’s assume you reached out to someone on their birthday. The dialogue has opened, and they have responded with ‘thanks!’. Take the opportunity to ask them if they have anything special planned or do anything special. They replied with ‘yes, went to dinner with my family. So naturally, it would be seamless to ask what restaurant or even type of food, right?

Perfect if you love their response, say so! If you don’t, maybe throw in why not.

Whatever the case is, find a way to relate. Food is an excellent topic because everyone has an opinion — cake, birthday cake! There are so many directions you can take in a conversation based on reaching out in a meaningful way.

By asking questions about the person (FORM – Family, Occupation, Recreation, Motivation), you can learn a ton about a person — and to keep it relatable and avoid it being an interview, be sure to share about yourself too.

Check them out – Without being a Creep.


I was having a little fun with this one! Seriously though, check out their profile page and timeline. Make yourself as up-to-date as possible about what is going on in your life right now. I generally suggest scrolling back 2-3 weeks, looking for key points you could bring up in conversation. Now, going back and liking all those posts or even ones from years ago can come off as creepy so let’s not go there.

But here’s the deal …

When you have an idea of what someone has been up to, they appreciate that.

Genuine conversations are a result of genuine interest in another person. It shows that although you don’t chat much, it is meant enough for you to know what they have been up to. Doing this will also help you gauge where someone is at — maybe even help lead you to a customer or distributor conversation eventually.

Listen, Listen and Listen some more.


People will always tell you what you need to know. The key to keeping in line with genuine conversations is patience. Just because you wish someone a happy birthday today doesn’t mean they’re buying from you tomorrow. So hang in there, focus on being a friend for real.

Now please keep in mind this does not mean that these conversations need to jeopardize a ton of your time either.

Some of them may be broken into multiple days or weeks even. Just remember that when you speak to them again, you spend more time listening (or reading) than you do talking.

Not everyone will open their Life book and share personal struggles with you! But, stay authentic and genuine to your interactions, and those things will come, almost guaranteed.

Stop the Brag Game!

You’re fantastic; we get it. But one of our tips to initiating and, more importantly, maintaining genuine conversations is to set your ego aside. Please keep the discussion about them (your prospect). Think of the last time you heard someone go on and on about their accomplishments, trophies or awards — boredom, right? It is OK to be proud of what you’ve done, but this isn’t the place to share it.

stories challenge

Contain your next Thought Excitement

As much as no one wants to feel sold, those same people don’t want to feel rushed either. If you’ve asked a question, let them finish their answer! This applies to both online and offline conversations. Spend more time focusing on the conversation than you do on what you want to say next.

Because the truth is, if your thought or story is exciting, it will be just as exciting in a few minutes.

Ask them how you can add value.

How you phrase this last tip will be dependent on a few things;

  1. your character/personality
  2. the business you are promoting
  3. whether you believe you can add value (belief in yourself goes a long way)

The word value in this context could be used interchangeably with help or feedback even. You, of course, want to figure out what works best for you, but an example could be;

Loved chatting with you; if there’s everything anything I can do to help or add value to your life, please don’t hesitate to let me know!‘.

Simple, direct, but above all else, a genuine ask.

And in closing, my ask is that if you gained value from this post, we would love for you to leave us a comment in addition to sharing with those you believe can benefit from this!

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genuine conversations